If you’re serious about meeting a guy, you’ve probably read a ton of articles already with different points of view on meeting and how to conduct yourself with what may just be Mr. Right.
When you’re ready to meet the man of your dreams, it’s important to know the right things to say and do. One mistake can cost you a chance of another meeting or date. Relationships are fragile especially in the beginning. Whether it’s a blind date or a chance meeting when you’re out with your friends, it’s important to realize that body language can go a long way with the initial meeting.
Okay, imagine this situation for a minute. You’re out with your friends and you notice a guy at the other end of the bar or restaurant looking in your direction, throwing glances and smiles your way. What do you do?
First of all, do not turn and immediately whisper to your friends, “hey look at the guy over there, he’s looking at me!” Suffice to say, he will immediately be turned off because he will think you’re talking about him and mocking him in some way. Guys, believe it or not, are sensitive creatures and the thought of mocking him will kill any chance of him coming over. Keep in mind he was looking at you, not your friends!
Secondly, if you like the man who’s looking at you, do not look away. Hold a glance back at him for 5 seconds. This lets him know you too find him attractive. Of course, you must smile a little bit too. Facial expression can say so much about how people perceive you whether you know it or not.
Thirdly, do not ignore his body language, give him the chance to come over to you. Maybe he will tell the waitress to send you a drink. If this happens and you like the guy, accept the kind gesture, look over at him, smile and say thanks! This gives him the courage to come over, especially if he’s with his friends!
Fourthly, don’t ignore the friends you are with. If and when he does come over, be kind, smile and introduce yourself then introduce him to your friends. This will give him a sense of importance and acceptance with your group.
Lastly, do not go home with him. You came with your friends, leave with your friends. This ups the respect and starts the possible relationship on the right foot. Instead, give him your number, but usually he’ll ask for yours first. If he doesn’t and you’d like to see him again, it’s perfectly fine to go ahead and give him your number.
The phone number thing would be different here. He would give you his, not the opposite. It would look pushy and intrusive he would ask for yours and very few women would give their phone # to a stranger anyway
I don’t think either to be with friends (particularly girlfriends) is the best way to attract a man and boost his confidence to come over and talk to you (if he’s on his own).
And last, but not least, a women, if she’s with her friends, would probably not accept a stranger to buy her a drink if he doesn’t to all of her friends too.This would be considered somewhat rude of him.
So, you see, other countries, other rules… 😉
Dot, don’t you think men should call women? That is how it is done in the USA
I think it’s a great article of things to be aware of when you’re out having fun. And I have seen groups of guys and girls out where one guy would buy just one girl a drink. I’ll definitely keep these tips in mind next time I go out anywhere!
I think it is elegant he would leave the choice up to you and respect your privacy at first in that context. But I’m French, so… 🙂 It is not as if we were on a date.
The first step, he has already done when he came to talk to you.
I remember, I think it was last Summer, I was with friends at a cafe in Paris, That guy (American) at the next table started to talk with me, then with my friends I would not have ignored anyway, We all introduced to one another. Then he offered to buy me a drink and not to my friends, I refused. Like you said, I was with my friends, so either you integrate the whole group or you wait to see me alone. Looked plain weird and rude here. Nobody would have understood and, to be honest, my friends told me afterwards they were shocked he could do that. None of us would have. Either you buy drinks to all or to none.
That’s why when you date foreigners, you’d rather learn the “rules” first. 🙂
PS : Imagine a single mother. No way I would have given my phone # to a stranger, because I was responsible for my child’s safety.
It is commonly admitted here, that, in that context (somebody you don’t know you meet by chance in the street or similar), the guy would give you his card and never ask for yours. Should he ask, he wouldn’t get it anyway, should he looklike George Clooney or Brad Pitt (weel maybe if he WAS george Clooney, he would LOL).
After reading this blog, I think the things you pointed out were very helpful! Especially if you live in the colder climates, everyone usually goes out to a gathering place like a bar or bar/restaurant to watch sports, or people sing and dance. I think it’s a great place to meet you friends and they will probably have friends that you don’t know. Thanks Jonathon!
Thanks Julie, I am happy you liked it. smiles
I usually do not make comments, but felt the need to make a comment to the above-noted article on giving out your phone number. I, personally, have a different take on this topic. I prefer to give my number because quite frankly, I would rather not initiate contact. Perhaps this is old fashioned, but I genuinely believe that a man should approach a woman for a date. In terms of giving out your number with respect to privacy and safety…there is an option on all of our phones now…we can block unwanted callers.
Thank you, Dot! A very handsome French gentleman introduced himself to me in the grocery store just that way (up till now I’d been quite skeptical this actually happens, LOL), so I’m happy to hear that’s the way things are supposed to go. 🙂
(I’d always thought so. My friends make fun of me and tell me I’m more European than American. I guess this bears it out, LOL.)
If you have any followup tips I am all ears. 🙂