More of the Best Understand Men Tips—Check Out #11–13
Hope you’re enjoying these tips and trying them! We start the second half of your Master’s degree course in men now. We’re talking about distrusting men, quality over quantity, and how men handle conflict.
These tips will help you get closer to him and show him you’re the woman he wants and needs.
Best Understand Men Tip #11
If a man is distrusting without you giving reason for mistrust, he is not ready for a relationship.
A distrusting man is either untrustworthy himself, carrying baggage from a past relationship, or is in the wrong relationship. You cannot help him.
Do this to find out where he stands:
Don’t neglect this one. If he’s showing you now that he doesn’t trust you, and it’s not fixed (if it even can be), this relationship cannot go far. This is one time you need to sit down with him, tell him how you feel with examples (no drama, just the facts, ma’am). Do not accuse, do not blame… just state your feelings, and then be quiet. Let him talk, and watch his body language while you listen.
Give him the benefit of the doubt, and assume he’s carrying baggage from a previous relationship. In fact, feel free to ask him if the lack of trust you feel is left over from a former girlfriend.
If you do not feel 100% comfortable with what he says, ask more questions if you wish. If you still don’t feel right, end the relationship.
Best Understand Men Tip #12
Men prefer quality over quantity.
This means that it’s better to have fantastic dates once or twice a week that leave a positive impression on both of you, and give you both a chance to decompress and “miss” the other, than to spend every day together. Quality builds attraction and attachment, not quantity.
Do this to make him crave you:
Make your time together as high quality as you can. Maybe you two love watching TV, and that’s fine. But I would suggest a walk in the park with a picnic basket or a drive in the country is a much better use of your time.
Make him the focus when you’re together. If you have class once a week and you need to study one night a week, let him be free to hang with the guys or do his own thing. The time you two do share will be that much more special.
Let him miss you once in a while, even if you’re in a long-standing relationship. Go out with the girls and have some fun once a week, or take a long weekend and go see your family without him.
Best Understand Men Tip #13
Observe how your man handles conflict in his life. Does he like to talk it through, or does he like to take time to mull things over? Is he a conflict avoider and disappears into his shell when faced with a difficult situation?
Knowing how your man handles conflict outside of your relationship will give you a good idea of how he’ll handle conflict between you. It’s a good idea to discuss how you’ll resolve your conflicts before they arise, so you have a good plan in place ahead of time and there won’t be any unpleasant surprises.
It’s okay if you have different conflict resolution “styles.” It’s important to know what they are.
Do this to make your relationship the best it can be:
When something goes wrong in your man’s life, watch how he handles it. Does he have a long or a short fuse? Does he stay upset for long, and what does he do when he’s not thrilled about something?
Conflict resolution is a key factor in a good relationship. If you can resolve disagreements and differences, your relationship will thrive. If you avoid them or cannot come to an agreement, you won’t be happy. Your styles of conflict resolution aren’t as important as how effective you are together, but you do need to know what his style is and make sure he knows yours.
For example, if your man likes to talk through it and you like to mull things over, if he can wait for you to be ready to talk, you’ll do fine. If he pushes you to talk too soon, it will cause further stress.
Knowing, understanding, and accepting each other’s conflict styles is one of the most effective ways to keep your relationship strong.
Join us in a few days and discover what it means when he talks about his ex, how to communicate an issue, and how to listen, really listen.
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