Meeting Organically or Meeting Online
Do you like meeting organically or what about online? This past Sunday night, while talking on the phone with a matchmaking service, getting ready to enter a speed dating event, and checking my emails from Match.com I realized I’ve not met anyone of interest organically.
What do I mean by that?
What I mean is, I’ve not met anyone new out in public and approached them with the intent of going out on the date.
So why is that? Well, there are a couple of reasons.
First and foremost, I’ve found internet dating as a fantastic way to screen out potential partners based on a series of compatibility questions I have for a potential life partner. For example: our views on religion, children, economics, social activities, hobbies and just an overall sense of who they are based on the written profile. In addition, online introductions, whether a dating site or even facebook, allow you to connect with a wider variety of people which creates greater opportunity than the random bumping into someone at the coffee shop.
So let’s examine this further, for years meeting your potential mate at work was the number one locale for those of us in the over 40 crowd. Here’s the thing, I work from home, and the chances of meeting single, available women “in” my apartment on the beach are kinda nil.
Another way to meet a potential life partner could be getting fixed up by friends, GOD forbid family (my dad tried that today and trust me, NO WAY) or even a matchmaking service. I’ve been fixed up by friends before, and I think my girlfriends have no clue what I am looking for (even after hours of conversations) and I have learned the hard way that’s not for me. Matchmaking services have potential in my book and in fact my first love after my divorce was a matchmaking introduction. While in the long run she was not the one for me, the fix up was a great match nonetheless. I think I might try a matchmaker again.
Now what about out in public, ok great! You see someone you’re attracted to and you hope they feel the same. After getting up the nerve to walk up to a total stranger and say “hi” are you single, spiritual but not religious, non smoker, don’t want any children, live within 40 miles of my home (hey they could be from another state), like going to dive bars, not into camping, had your fill of skiing and snowboarding, ok that I have two small children and I’m not in a position to take care of you financially because of alimony & child support… wanna go out on a date? WOW that was a mouthful, how do you think that went over? LOL
What I personally like about online dating is that many of my questions about whether we are a fit get answered before ever meeting. Now I realize we can’t learn everything about a person before we meet and certainly chemistry usually is experienced in person, but for me, I like the pre date before the real date. But hey, being over 40, single, and looking to fall in love, I’m open to all possibilities of where I will meet her and if it happens in person or online, I’ll be stoked. Will keep ya posted.